Hearing Loss can be a Scary and Emotional Thing

November 16, 2014

It was a scary moment for me when I realized it was happening again. My ears for some reason were filling back up with fluid after the tube in my right ear came out. At first, I just noticed little things. I was saying, "What? I can't hear you."

Then I noticed, things I was saying wasn't coming out right, "What did I just say?" It was when I started noticing myself getting frustrated, that it hit me. I stopped taking all calls from my phone simply because I couldn't hear people and the volume was all the way up.

I found myself hanging up in the middle of a conversation just because it was affecting me emotionally. It would bring me to tears. I was continuing my doctors visits, which confirmed what I already knew, there was fluid building up in my ears.

The bad news was I was losing hearing. The good news was, the fluid in my ears were acting like a "buffer" which actual reduced my hyperacusis and minimized my vertigo symptoms. On a positive note, I wasn't throwing up as much and the vertigo wasn't hitting me quite as hard.

Instead of the room flipping and feeling like I was going to pass out it was more of a constant off balance feeling, a feeling I was going to fall or just a general dizziness. Even though I still had the nausea at least it wasn't everyday.

It was a very dangerous waiting game I was playing with my ears. If I waited to long infection could set in and cause another ruptured eardrum or worse permanent loss of hearing. However, due to the fluid acting like a "buffer" I was advancing in my therapeutic walks where I managed to go out for a third time without earplugs or earmuffs for protection from sound.

It was in September the decision was made, I would have my third ear surgery. On October 7, 2014, I went into the hospital for a double ear surgery. The right ear would get a new long lasting tube as the other tube came out just after a few months and my left ear was getting that tube changed out.

The tube in the left ear was not sitting in the canal in the correct way, I never noticed it helping any way and had continue issues with the ear crackling, feeling blocked and painful. The right ear was the same there was constant issues.

The doctors spoke with me about my decision knowing full well it was just days before my second surgery the tinnitus set in and right after the surgery sounds were painful to me. I also ended up with having severe directional hearing issues and severe vertigo.

My doctors wanted to make it clear the decision to have my hearing back could possibly cause not only my tinnitus to come back full blown but it could flared up my hyperacusis, vertigo and it was uncertain the affects it may have on my directional hearing issues.

However, it was a chance I had to take, I was losing my hearing and may lose it all together. As scary as it was having been diagnosed with all these conditions it was even more scary to think of losing my hearing all together. I traded one issue for another.