Thankful I hear what I do..

April 25

The hearing didn't come back quite as much as we had hoped and I'm having difficulty adjusting to it all. I work in alot of group settings and I found it hard to hear someone right in front of me with alot of cross conversations going on or alot of background noises. People with certain tones I can't hear, definately problems with hearing the direction sounds are coming from whether its spoken or ... noise and a problem with recognition of what a sound is.

 

Work is hard along with being out in public alot of the background noise blocks out what I'm trying to hear.. by the end of my first day back to work I had such a headache from straining to hear and just my brain trying to recognize it over all the other noises around. The phone is a bit better I can hear calls but now it hurts..whatever that other noise is on the phone my ears are sensative too it.

I have to be more aware of my surroundings too for other safety reasons as well so I've started training, hearing my alarm is hard or even hearing the phone viberate. A vehicle almost hit me my first day back out and about for work so now I'm working strictly through correspondents until my next testing..something just seems off.. I still have moments of vertigo come and go..but always the constant ringing in the ears it never stops day or night.

It's exhausting having a hearing problem..

It makes me aware of what I have and to be thankful while making me sad as well for what I can no longer do or hear. The doing part I can work around by just adapting to it finding other ways.. that's when a person needs to really count on themselves their inner strength.

When I'm sitting at my computer doing work and its raining..unless its down pour I can't hear it.. I use to love sitting at the computer working and hearing the birds, the rain, the wind..

If outside I can hear some birds now, unless the rain is coming down steady I can't hear it.. I can't hear a light rain..it will take time to get use to. I'm past the shock of it all... ( OR SO I THOUGHT )

It just breaks my heart to experience this... to know this is what its like not to hear..thankful I can hear any little sound I can..thrilled in fact..its very..

It gives me a new awareness of what we take for granted..what I took for granted..I know I write and talk about loving a walk with the wind wrapping around me but I don't think I ever mentioned the sound the wind made.. I took it for granted..